Miss Independent

For the past three or so years, I seriously believed in "I'm only me when I'm with you". I felt so comfortable with my boyfriend at the time and I viewed him as my second half. The peanut butter to my jelly. The ping to my pong. After a complete shattering of my heart, I slowly started to realize that as much as I thought I'd found myself, I had hardly even taken the first step on my journey to discover the person I am and want to be. I had barely gotten my foot in the door. Obviously it took some time to start to move forward from a nearly three year relationship, but I started to and I am continuing to. Believe it or not, despite the sting of the pain every so often, I'm more excited than ever to be by myself. Especially at my age, going through my college years, this is the time where I need to figure out who I am without spending time and focusing all my energies on being with someone else. I don't have to worry about missing him when he's gone for a little while, or making sure we're on the same page, or worrying about what he's doing, or putting his happiness before my own. Now, this is coming from a complete hopeless romantic. I really love everything love and when I love I love hard. So, it's really saying something for me to say that right now its important that I stay single for a little while. I've realized that it's really important for most to have that some point in their growing-up years where they can separate and grow on their own. I'm not saying that anyone should by any means break-up with their significant other just to try out being by themselves if something is working really great, but maybe step away and travel or do some different things without your other. You might discover new things that you might love that you can grow from. I think its absolutely amazing for two people to go through these changes and be able to stay strong. Its truly a beautiful thing. Unfortunately, that didn't happen in my case. But, instead of looking at it as a curse, I'm taking the "everything happens for a reason" route in saying that it is a blessing. I still might not know the exact reason, but I'm sure I'll find it. I've already started to open up more and feel more comfortable being myself. I can only hope everyone goes through a time where they are truly happy and feel free to do whatever they want to do and be whoever they want to be. It's really a fantastic feeling. I encourage everyone to take a minute out of their day and ask themselves a question like, "am I who I want to be?", "what can I do next?", "what adventure should I take tomorrow?", "how can I be the best me that I can?", "am I happy? How can I change anything that's making me unhappy?" Answering these questions and acting on those answers can turn your whole world around in a great way. So, find yourself. Be whoever you want to be. Do whatever you want to do that's going to fulfill you. Making changes can be hard, but if you think it'll help you be the best version of yourself you can be, trust me - it will be worth it. Love yourself, and you'll find so much more love in everything else. I can honestly say that I am. I am learning more and more as my days pass by.